Thank you for all the support! Seeing complete strangers care about my situation really warmed my heart.1yr · MufasaQuePasa · r/RoastMe
Ten years ago I purchased a $50 Groupon for professional acting headshots. The results were... unfortunate. Please destroy me for this choice.3mo · mikeyvanilli · r/RoastMe
I roasted this baby picture my Mom printed on Christmas thinking it was my uncle. Turns out, it’s me. Turn the grill up please4mo · TheHazel_Leo · r/RoastMe
3.2 million karma and accepted to Harvard but never kissed a girl- Roast me1yr · etymologynerd · r/RoastMe
46 yr old, works at a bank, no savings, don’t own a home, no retirement, but I drive a Bentley and smoke bong hits on the toilet..Give me your best shot!6mo · Herbit420 · r/RoastMe
Remember me, tumor guy? Well surgery is done and I'm still kicking and alive for everyone who's been asking for an update. Now tell me how much better off i was with the tumor.1yr · asmordious · r/RoastMe
I play video games for a living and don't leave the house for multiple days in a row. Roast me :)2mo · Katerinotv · r/RoastMe
Fighting a rare stage four cancer called leomyosarcoma. Make me feel worse.1mo · bookc420 · r/RoastMe
I did one of these 4 years ago and I bettered myself with what you all said. Help me better myself again!3mo · Boxed_Milk · r/RoastMe
When I was a kid I would get so lonely sometimes that I would create multiple Facebook accounts and post on my own wall and then reply to it back and forth so that it would look like I had friends.1mo · PlanetSquare · r/RoastMe
I’m 23 working a dead-end job for less than living wage, my only friends are old people and I smoke a disturbing amount of weed to escape. Self-loathing is lonely, come join the party.1mo · crestfallenpumpkin · r/RoastMe
[Update] he decided to leave me to ‘find himself’ so now I’m spending my holidays alone and debating on getting bangs. Roast me harder than you did the other one3mo · SpicyBorkBois · r/RoastMe
26 years old, got my first vehicle I can drive by myself. Living my best life. What ya got?6mo · BOHICABYTHEBUFF · r/RoastMe
I just turned 18 but i don't look like it. My friends call me single parent.7mo · herki20 · r/RoastMe
I’m a lonely 4chan dweller, in college for computer engineering. I’m unsuccessfully attempting to fit in with the bitchy girls I’m surrounded with. Roast me.4mo · nobodysbusiness77897 · r/RoastMe
I'm a Swiss army soldier. I'm waiting for my military service to end so I can finally go to university. Roast me.4mo · Calugorron · r/RoastMe
36, high on morphine, 2nd surgery this year, 14th total but it didn’t take a brain surgeon to tell me Epstine didn’t kill him self.4mo · WolfPanLuck · r/RoastMe
Had to shave my sweet beard for the fire academy. Distract me from my pain.3mo · mimsy2389 · r/RoastMe
22. My best friend is my cat. Literally allergic to sunlight and spend my entire life in my apartment. Have 20 giant screws in my spine from back surgery. So anxious that I retook this pic almost 15 times. Do your worst.1mo · flowers_and_the_moon · r/RoastMe
I’m a 22 year old wannabe actor with no talent who always looks tired. Just got my wisdom teeth yoinked. Anyone wanna make my Valentine’s Day sweeter? 💕1mo · Selcecsam · r/RoastMe
I moved to Malta to be with my boyfriend. We bought a house together. We broke up. We still live together and he’s currently downstairs ‘entertaining’ female guests.1yr · BooBooMadonna · r/RoastMe
I'm 18 and I've never even held hands with someone, also I'm a gamer girl. fuck my shit up5mo · cute_cloud · r/RoastMe
24 y/o Mexican, been single for 3 years, and I enjoy well done steaks(with ketchup).. Do your worst1mo · fedmyster · r/RoastMe
Roast me! Oh, and did I mention that I just found out my wife is gay and not interested in me.4mo · Papa-Wizard · r/RoastMe
Autistic female community college student who is proud to sport a unibrow! I'm not scared of your roasts!8mo · PrincessLRBHSF · r/RoastMe
22 year old college student. Just found out my girlfriend was fucking another guy and I've already had a fifth of vodka today. Try your best.11mo · CmdMuffins · r/RoastMe
Got testicular cancer twice in less than a year. Just had my second orchiectomy, no longer have balls. Cheer me up by putting me down.10mo · kasperokaspero · r/RoastMe
25, Dyed my hair for my quarter life crisis. Going to school to become an SLP...but ironically I have a lisp.7mo · Adoorabell · r/RoastMe
I'm a journalist writing about r/Roastme. Give me some firsthand experience. Disclaimer: I'm writing about this in the article.2mo · inverse · r/RoastMe
College girl and highschool senior that decided to do long distance after a month of dating - one month in - destroy us like plane tickets destroyed me8mo · kylebranam · r/RoastMe
A rock climbing accident left me with a concussion, black eye, broken nose, and sprained wrist. How much damage can you do?8mo · Sarahcro · r/RoastMe
I just got dumped, gained weight and have a fuckton to study for uni. Obliterate me.8mo · aikohoover · r/RoastMe
I'm an Electrical and Computer engineering student without the discipline to succeed in quarantine. Say something shocking.5d · uns3riously · r/RoastMe
Hello! I am a Hufflepuff librarian who enjoys playing Dungeons and Dragons with my friends and fiance. I have lived with Juvenile Myoclonic Epilepsy ever since I was ten and it has given me a sense of humour. I hope to be the next Mr. Rogers someday, so roast me and I'll toast you!4mo · C0tt0nCandyIc3Cr34m · r/RoastMe
21 year old manager at a call center thinking of starting Twitch streaming. Give me what you got.5mo · satanalli · r/RoastMe
About a year ago you guys roasted me into oblivion. Since then I've gotten a job at a movie theater. Do it again!7mo · minedgammer · r/RoastMe
Roast me harder than my Turkish family already does on the daily for being unwed at the ancient age of almost 301yr · Eliyaahh · r/RoastMe
My friends call me Big Country. I’m 6’7”, can finish a bottle of wine in 30 seconds, and off-road my daily driver BMW that has a lightbar on it.1mo · macho_llama · r/RoastMe
I doubt you could say anything my family hasn’t already said. College student, Stoner, cereal box shaped body. Let me have it2mo · fakefrenchbitch · r/RoastMe
I’m an 80 year old professional stoner who forgets his Reddit Passwords. Roast me!1yr · sohighforgotpassword · r/RoastMe
I had to ask to lose my v-card and if I showed you my teeth it would be over. Ruin me! :D6mo · TerranasaurusWrecks · r/RoastMe
Desert storm veteran tougher skin then all of you millennial snowflakes do your worst...1yr · Cowboybenbob217 · r/RoastMe
Ok let's get harder I am 27 years old, I am from Russia. I have a baby face and a terrible sweater, and a girl left me yesterday (not because of a sweater) Make everyone funny! (I write through Google translate)5mo · Omldus · r/RoastMe
20 and dying of cancer at the reddit HQ, had lunch with Spez, please tear me a new one!2yr · chrisbeta916 · r/RoastMe
Bored Mexican vet nurse on the night shift at work. Burn me hard so I don’t fall asleep.7mo · supersonic_seal · r/RoastMe
34 with big ears. Let me hear the same old jokes I have heard my whole life.10mo · Golden_Thumbs · r/RoastMe
We’ve been dating for years but people still think we are siblings - roast us more than our profs did after this semester9mo · SpicyBorkBois · r/RoastMe
Local 18 y/o fake intellectual fighting writer's block. Burn it away, reddit9mo · Trashaccouuntt · r/RoastMe
28f. Used to work for the government, now I'm a sahm of 2 kids, am on antidepressants and have terrible hair! Also, I only eat plants. Roast me like falafel.6mo · littleshroom · r/RoastMe
3 engineering roomates think your roasts are trash. Prove our brown asses wrong.5mo · king_t_Challa · r/RoastMe
Turned 18 today, spent it crying alone in my room eating a fish burger and making a porn hub account. Please make my birthday better by gifting me your sweet sweet roasts.4mo · yourmumslefttoe · r/RoastMe
I [F18] just woke up. Mods made me verify my age with ID proof. Roast me harder than they already have.5mo · crtruo · r/RoastMe
Made this all on me own today, took me 4 hours! Roast me back to ground level please.8mo · silentheory · r/RoastMe
I'm 24, I just won my second ever roast battle this last Friday (link in comments) and I want to see some savagery. Do your worst, Reddit.10mo · Colonelwheel · r/RoastMe
My girlfriend just broke up with me 5 days before our 6 year annivesary! Kick me while im down!6mo · TyrawesomeRex · r/RoastMe
My girlfriend doesn't believe in your roasting abilities. Proof her wrong! ;)8mo · DansendeDirk · r/RoastMe
My friend here is a software engineer; the only girl in the team. For some reason, she's eager to get rOaStEd!7mo · chiraggsam · r/RoastMe
My parents just got divorced and my abusive father disowned me and tried to kill me with his car. Swimmer, skater, physics and math major, and a disgrace to all Asians around the world. Y'all can't do shit to me 🤷🏻♂️8mo · ZachTheYek · r/RoastMe
22yr old ex-tweaker of 8 years fresh out of rehab, working at a gas station, finish me7mo · Deep6thatshit · r/RoastMe
Trans-woman, engineer, 6'1 giant, forever alone, still listens to ska. Lost everything but my dick (november!) and my dignity - burn me to the ground.10mo · jessica_ftw · r/RoastMe
18 year old high school graduate who works at McDonald's and has no plans for college. Figured I would finally do this. Make it hurt!1mo · InfernoDeesus · r/RoastMe
Been saving up the ugy for all of your entertainment. Roast the rest of my eyebrows off and make this worth it, will ya?6mo · Fewd4Thot · r/RoastMe
18m 6'3 Norwegian who loves kittens and death metal, in that order. Been a while since I've seen a good roast on here, so why don't y'all try a bit harder for this one?3mo · gitartruls01 · r/RoastMe
19 and dropped out of community college to smoke weed. I bet you can’t hurt my feelings1yr · spicyvaginataco · r/RoastMe
Lifeguarding at an empty pool for 7 hours, give me something to laugh at9mo · SorranTheGrey · r/RoastMe
Got banned from 4chan and now I don't have anywhere to go to get bullied. It's been a week since someone told me to kill myself and I'm getting too uppity. I'm a full-time meme painter and I smell like I look.1yr · watchpaintdrytv · r/RoastMe
23 years old. Can't get a job because I refuse to change my hair. Had a dream last night that I shit my pants while trying to initiate sex.6mo · theflowerintheattic · r/RoastMe
My coworkers and I got to dress up. I made it easy for you!! Ruin my Halloween.5mo · dg327 · r/RoastMe
My friend is selling his house, quitting his job, getting rid of everything he owns and is going to try to live a budgetted life while couch surfing. Please, please light him up.11mo · Poppyspacekitten · r/RoastMe
Bought discount Valentine's Day candy to make myself feel better after walking in on my dad masturbating. Guess it's time to move out after 25 years in the basement. Go ahead and roast me, Reddit!1mo · joejoebuckbuck · r/RoastMe
Insecure Indian girl who works in a lab. Second roast me post, bored at work, roast me?3wk · majonee15 · r/RoastMe
My 7th grader got made fun of at school today. He didn't want to tell me because he thought I might not understand. Reddit, please help me show him how to take the burn!7mo · Nater84 · r/RoastMe
24 years old and 12 days post heart transplant. They say laughter can make a bad situation better. Give it to me!6mo · paulcain95 · r/RoastMe
Quit meth and replaced it with dumplings. Gained almost 100 lbs in a year. I don't even have a good personality to make up for it.1yr · Nonsense_Addict · r/RoastMe
I broke a vertebrae and have been high on hash cookies for the last six weeks. Put my pain tolerance back in check.10mo · ThunderDragn666 · r/RoastMe
I'm 22, college educated, work out consistently, and my parents love each other, do your worst11mo · Skywalker7671 · r/RoastMe
17, broke my back jumping off an 85 foot cliff into water. My girlfriend is making me get roasted for being a dumbass1yr · Thefucklest · r/RoastMe
Headed to a friends wedding & feeling super vulnerable bc of it... finish me8mo · kimboism · r/RoastMe
Other than my wig falling apart, tell me why I was right about quitting cosplay.9mo · Uncosample · r/RoastMe
Biggest accomplishment of my life is a 36 on the ACT. 6 years later I’m living with my parents and working at a salad shop for minimum wage. I was sent home by a 19 year old manager for making salads too slowly. Reddit, toss my salad!11mo · Ojhumblerumble · r/RoastMe
Toast me bitches. Please avoid fat jokes unless they are original, I’ve heard them all.9mo · SDmedia9 · r/RoastMe
Bought 3 goats in High school for FFA project, now 22 years old still living at home taking care of them1yr · Sphamuel · r/RoastMe
