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[important John Mulaney post:]

A design of our Steel Slat Barrier which is totally effective while at the same time beautiful!

“hail hydra”

they couldn’t get Krasinski to sit in the audience and just do this

██████████

tom cruise after trying to explain motion smoothing to my father

tonight, Grimace's long game finally pays off

you're an oscar winner you're an oscar winner

[declutters Oscars] [show ends at 8:47 pm]

@eScarry for posterity

it's not too late to salvage this

a quick peek into the Howard Schultz 4 America PAC skybox

if you missed any portion of this press conference:

I have never related more to a politician.

🎄 merry christmas! 🎄

“no one need know that I am secretly clapping for soup”

avenge the fallen

[arrives at White House]

please don’t spoil the ending for anyone who hasn’t seen it yet

COWORKER: how was your we- ME:

almost too easy but the universe demands it

guess the surprise ending. c’mon, guess

your guide to the 2019 Democratic presidential primary debates

The Barr Letter:

president trump

a State of the Union delivered in writing, you say

now this is just cruel

“a WHOLE album of covers, you say?”

Forrest management

Have we all already forgotten when Sean Penn wrote about farting in front of El Chapo

bradley cooper time

is everybody else seeing this too

the Academy Award-winning Black Panther

Fast food is truly the great unifier

sorry, one more

Pence handled that well, though

There must be decorum at the White House.”

when u see Melissa McCarthy across a red carpet

[stefon voice] this tweet has everything

PETER PARKER: This could literally not get any weirder. LADY GAGA:

if he doesn't win the Race Bannon cosplay contest, America should withdraw from the APEC summit

Extremely normal

this infographic from @MiamiHerald report () is its own play in 4 acts

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