Enjoy it while it lasts, kid.

6yr ⋅ ⋅

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How it feels to be a Millennial

7yr ⋅

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I was just letting her know that rent was due.

6yr ⋅

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I housed a wild neighborhood cat through the winter and let him escape when it got warm out. After a month without seeing him, I noticed a visitor at my door.

7yr ⋅

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It's like whispering for help from the bathroom stall of an empty warehouse

7yr ⋅

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The Decended Quickly 😐🔫

8yr ⋅

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I think you posted in the wrong sub, dude.

7yr ⋅

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Adulting Sucks.

8yr ⋅

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All of my 1 upvote, unnoticed comments from 4+ months ago just went to 0.

8yr ⋅

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It's like winning the lotter... Oh.

8yr ⋅

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Sorry I annoyed you with my regular sleeping patterns.

8yr ⋅

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He said it like he was kidding, but he's not.

7yr ⋅

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Take that!

7yr ⋅

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Only one way to find out!

7yr ⋅

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Achievement Unlocked: Post-Divorce Maturity

8yr ⋅

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This mobile game advocates murder for children 12+ and rape for ages 18+ as their advertising pitch.

5yr ⋅

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I recently broke up with my gf and I'm living without a woman in the house for the first time.

9yr ⋅

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Stay furry, my friends.

7yr ⋅

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Straight to the league

6yr ⋅

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Living in America and seeing everyone else's government health and child care services is making me very sad for my people.

6yr ⋅

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When you have ants but forget the word exterminator

8yr ⋅

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I don't just need a bath, I need a baptism.

10yr ⋅

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If you could auto tune your butt, would you?

9yr ⋅

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I rely too heavily on the upvotes to tell me what's real.

7yr ⋅

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Karma. That shit is real.

7yr ⋅

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That may not be how this works, but it'll have to do.

7yr ⋅

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Making memories that will last a lifetime.

7yr ⋅

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Some people have very.. unique beliefs.

7yr ⋅

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I was looking at bizarre medical cases and this aparently needs to be said.

9yr ⋅

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YOU know that YOU ARE RIGHT, and that is all that really matters.

6yr ⋅

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I'm going to my gf's hipster work event tonight. Will be having this conversation with at least 5 different people.

7yr ⋅

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I'm straight, but a compliment is a compliment

7yr ⋅

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This was an eye opener.

10yr ⋅

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How is it going? & What's up?

7yr ⋅

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These whack jobs just ruined my ambition to be a better person. Pass the steak.

7yr ⋅

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Whenever a female friend complains about being single.

10yr ⋅

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I stopped regularly watching tv a few years back and the front page just hit me like a brick.

7yr ⋅

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I quit my job this morning in a fit of rage, my friend texts me this picture of my work truck 3 hours later.

11yr ⋅

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You have been warned.

9yr ⋅

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When I was 17, I thought Orgy, Deadsy and Coal Chamber were the future of music. To clarify, I am totally a dude.

8yr ⋅

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Social anxiety is a real fuck in the ass.

9yr ⋅

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Right-wing celebrities, destroying their own reputations are now blaming 'Smear Campaigns' from the left. The lack of accountability is pathetic.

3yr ⋅

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This license plate is literally just a single digit.

8yr ⋅

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I just reopened my Facebook after 2 years away, today is my birthday, and my wall is blowing up. Just one question comes to mind..

6yr ⋅

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I've been keeping in shape lately and it leads to a lot of confusion.

8yr ⋅

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This is going to be a hell of a lesson to learn the hard way..

11yr ⋅

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I want a woman that loves me for the cash in my wallet, not the length of my legs.

6yr ⋅

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A girl I've been seeing sent me a picture message and I have no signal to open it.

9yr ⋅

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I will find you, and I will kill you.

10yr ⋅

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Trying on clothes? Demo them in different positions!

7yr ⋅

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It was like being forced to share your toys AND your identity.

7yr ⋅

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After seeing the same posts hit the front page, month after month for years.

7yr ⋅

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Even The Best Ones Still Don't Appeal To Me

10yr ⋅

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She was right in the next room and I really didn't want to offend

7yr ⋅

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The air is thick with my revenge.

7yr ⋅

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Keep it classy, Toledo.

12yr ⋅

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The kind of wisdom you find during conversations with other men.

9yr ⋅

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6 kids, 1 eyebrow, 420 friendly, not dtf

10yr ⋅

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Looking at you Electronic Arts

7yr ⋅

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I should go to the gym.

7yr ⋅

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Today is not a good day for my ironic tattoo.

9yr ⋅

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Low contrast Barcodes are not practical.

8yr ⋅

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Hey /r/aww, I see you trending.

7yr ⋅

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I've never felt so helpless in my entire life.

7yr ⋅

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Best. Feeling. Ever. - get protective glass if you haven't. It doesn't always work, but it doesn't always also not work either.

6yr ⋅

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This is a phrase that now serves as THE red flag for all of my future relationships.

8yr ⋅

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🎼It's a small world after all🎶

7yr ⋅

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Protip for people who like weird shit.

7yr ⋅

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This ad just looks like everyone is fed up with Zooey Deschanel's shit.

7yr ⋅

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Found this in a child's room at an evicted house. God bless.

11yr ⋅

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The Jerry Springer show finally comes to Facebook.

12yr ⋅

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Ignorance is Bliss

7yr ⋅

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Old people attics have weird shit.

11yr ⋅

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The first image that appears when searching a local gentlemen's establishment.

7yr ⋅

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How did they even notice I was gone? Are they watching me?

9yr ⋅

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Is that really the best outfit/picture to attach to this sad narrative?

5yr ⋅

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My favorie picture of my small girl army.

9yr ⋅

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I don't want to be 'that guy', but I also don't want to go to the store, either.

9yr ⋅

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Well.. I guess I just lost that potential account.

8yr ⋅

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Remember my burning truck from yesterday? Same job, just 1 day prior to quitting. (Story in comments)

11yr ⋅

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It was just a joke.

7yr ⋅

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I pay the troll toll every single day.

7yr ⋅

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After an experience like this.. what else is there?

11yr ⋅

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I just realized why I am broke. I've been following the wrong advice way too closely.

7yr ⋅

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My office still runs on Windows XP and a software tech spent all day showing us a tutorial for a product we can't run. His response:

7yr ⋅

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This should be the official bunny selling uniform.

9yr ⋅

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Rap on the radio.

11yr ⋅

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Reposting should not be a full time job.

7yr ⋅

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He tries to catch her at lunch all the time and always just ends up driving by an empty house.

7yr ⋅

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JUST WAKE ME THE FRICK UP!

6yr ⋅

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The finale would be delicious. (Facebook)

10yr ⋅

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Sometimes it's just the little things.

8yr ⋅

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This is probably why you don't make $15 an hour.

7yr ⋅

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Someone's feeling blue.

7yr ⋅

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Jerk figured out how to open it by himself.

8yr ⋅

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Decided to take a break from Reddit and catch up on my real life. See you guys again in two weeks.

9yr ⋅

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As a seasonal road worker, waiting for work to kick in.

8yr ⋅

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Fount this one on OKPutrid

9yr ⋅

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This man hole on a Detroit sidewalk is extremely hazardous.

9yr ⋅

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Bill Cosby, Donald Trump, Harvey Weinstein, Roy Moore... shouldn't somebody be in jail?

6yr ⋅

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Only 70's, 80's & early 90's kids will understand.

7yr ⋅

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I could not have braced myself for this last winter.

8yr ⋅

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TFW I view my own post history.

7yr ⋅

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As an American, I honestly had faith that Obama would turn the entire world around, and the past year has made me feel like a giant ass for ever falling for the hype.

11yr ⋅

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Well this is shitty.

7yr ⋅

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At least she acknowledged the source. [Tinder Moment]

9yr ⋅

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I was put on homo suspicion for singing at work today.

10yr ⋅

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A former co-worker of mine started a GoFund me account because he's about to be homeless.

9yr ⋅

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This picture has date me written all over it.

10yr ⋅

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Illness not only affects you, but also the ones you love most.

6yr ⋅

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I could have a title like Productivity Manager, or Corporate Liason, or Huge Dick

7yr ⋅

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I'm not the manliest of blokes.

9yr ⋅

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My cousin absolutely blew my mind.. 23 is old enough to know better.

10yr ⋅

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With memes this dank, the high courts should be considering them admissible evidence!

3yr ⋅

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When you need your guitar to rock as hard as you hate different cultural backgrounds.

6yr ⋅

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I've noticed a pattern of consistency in my love life.

10yr ⋅

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Can you all just mind your damn business? My head furs are none of your concern.

6yr ⋅

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This happened when I was 10. I thought I was being kidnapped.

10yr ⋅

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So humiliated? Really?

8yr ⋅

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Because Sometimes, One Red Flag Isn't Enough

10yr ⋅

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As a man with long hair for the first time in his life.

8yr ⋅

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Didn't like pork chops - but the wife just changed everything forever. [OC] [4032x3024]

7yr ⋅

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Because I really want to hang the same ornament up three times a day for a whole month.

8yr ⋅

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Saw a Chrysler Pokemon Trainer Cruiser today. Blue and Red edition.

11yr ⋅

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I feel like my daughter is about to steal my girl.

7yr ⋅

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Let's stand up for ourselves and end this injustice of product marketing!

9yr ⋅

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An acquaintance of mine made the peculiar choice of painting just his head. How bizarre.

10yr ⋅

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Google claims that DMX was cast in a 1916 film titled Broken Fetters

7yr ⋅

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She wasn't, but she did remarry and seems to be doing quite well.

8yr ⋅

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Cuz it's Sunday, springtime, I'm off work, and I ain't got shit to do.

8yr ⋅

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Went to McDonald's and asked for 3 sides of ranch for my fries. :/

12yr ⋅

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Oh, bloody gosh darn heck.

10yr ⋅

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The solar eclipse isn't the only once-in-a-lifetime alignment to behold.

7yr ⋅

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When honesty is synonymous with stupidity.

8yr ⋅

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This is Pizza and he's my best friend. He wandered out of the house earlier and I'm a bit anxious about when he will find his way back.

7yr ⋅

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Mall mannequin was inaccurately clothed.

10yr ⋅

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Can anyone ID this guitar? [Link in comments]

7yr ⋅

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I accidentally re-purchased a $40 item I already own because I thought these buttons were just examples. They don't even tell you what item you're buying, just the store's name.

6yr ⋅

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