Sighs in American
Gonna be a mighty king
Who’s the asshole?
Best served cold
It’s about SACRIFICE
The real correlation
Murdered by (your father’s) words
Probably gonna have to pay a fine
These medication caps display how long ago a medication opened to help memory impaired patients or caregivers know if a patient took their medication
Albino leatherback sea turtle baby
Vote him out 2020
Not about the flag
Make it fast
Not gonna happen
A bit suspicious
I get it now
None of us knew
You must be a rebel
Will you rock us?
Mom calling her kid’s school and tries to have the school nurse diagnose and treat her lady parts over the phone
Uplifting start to my Friday
This aged well
Every time we have people over, my cat finds the most allergic person and lies in their lap.
Actual footage from earlier today
This would work better on a transparent bottle
Hours of family fun!
God creating our pigs
And just like that... I have a new favorite quote
Big Hoop Attitude
Betty White still going strong
I am a mature adult
Interesting flex 🤣
We’re a simple species.
Which one is the most useless?
Remember my cat that learned to open his food container? We put it up higher and blocked it. He has outsmarted us. No remorse.
Very important. Plan ahead.
Come at me
Just for funsies (link in comments)
Time to punish the humans
Grocery store cart has an adjustable phone mount so your digital grocery list is easily visible without holding your phone
Definitely starts with a 3...
FFS. Disturbing statistics
These three are becoming more comfortable together! The black piggie (Hazelnut) burrowed under the kitty’s chin to get comfy and then groomed his paws :)
Changing times mean changing laws
Ants hand painted on porcelain tea set
No clue where they go
Everything else is a violation of law
No one knows where it originated but most people suspect aliens
I’ll take “SAVAGE” for $200, Alex.
3 banana peels vs blue turtle shell
Dang it, Phil!
Daily reminder to not be nice...🙄
Brain not pulling its weight.
Big brain time
That’s smocking gun to you.
The Monster Media
His parents have been arrested after leading police to his body 🤬😥
Found cleaning out my mom and dad’s house
So...it works a little...
Raise your hand if this tweet made you feel 25 years older
Wait’ll these folks hear about pineapples!
That’s not a spider!
Why the distinction?
My kitty is savage
So very much
A member from the local republican group (also in the parade) gave the IL representative a Nazi salute and shouted hate speech
At least it’s honest? Caring more about guns than kids’ lives
A handy guide
Dessert is a distant second
It’s called thinking ahead, Guys.
Probably just being dramatic about those pesky hormones
Can we get on this, Netflix?
Every political argument ever.
An amazing athlete
What if... bad?
Conditions don’t match the crime
I feel attacked
Shhhh... don’t tell
No, no it’s not.
What’s it like to live in a country where the president understands the law? Asking for 330 million friends.
Sign at the theater I went to
Uh, yeah. I have a few questions... Let’s start with this one- what if the lion sprayed bullets aimlessly into a crowd of porcupines?
What chapter/verse is this?
To get to the light switch as soon as you open the door you need to pass your hand under the motion activated Purell dispenser. I go into this office about once a month or so and forget every time and end up with a forearm full of hand sanitizer
Everyone deserves a living wage
Until next year
unrealistic beauty standard
Can anyone identify this stitch?
Every single day.
Read it again
Presented without caption.
Merriam-Webster has the best words
Reddit, in a nutshell
Good old fashioned bribery
Nurse on deathbed admits she swapped thousands of babies at birth
The notice on it flags it as false information
My piggies! I’ve been lurking for a while and love seeing everyone’s pigs! These are our two- Sugar on the left and Hazelnut on the right :)
Guy claims he accidentally molested a toddler (twice) because he mistook the three year old for his wife.
My boyfriend’s piggie freezes every time I touch him or his food 😳
Wheaties box from 1992 found at my parent’s house
Feminism helps men and women
Haven’t reached this far since I had to get the Xmas tree out of the attic
My dream is that they’ll be best friends
Fine line indeed
Too bad the analogy would be lost on Individual 1
Can’t imagine why he’s single
My daughter shows no remorse for this life choice.
This exchange after he said “How much you wanna bet we have sex by the third date?” (We had not met-and never did)
Need an answer fast