I went to a Halloween party that turned out to be a surprise wedding, this was my wedding attire.1yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/simpsonsshitposting
Trying not to masturbate to get back my clitoral sensitivity for when I see my long distance boyfriend (for the first time in 6 months) in a week.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
This post being given a wholesome award and the five year old victim being called a woman instead of a child.1yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/mildyinfuriating
I figured mixing protein powder into peanut butter would be a stellar idea9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/shittyfoodporn
Maine Coons are a majestic and mesmerizing looking breed and yet this is what I got.8yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/cats
I used some pantyhose as a cheesecloth and ended up with some unexpected Freudian imagery11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/funny
HIF ever since I started drinking my morning cup of coffee at work10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
HIFW a redditor who was recently and very publicly called out for being the site's biggest pervert sent me a flirtatious PM and I responded with a video of fart sounds10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW I see a photo of a room on reddit and I recognize it as the room where I lost my virginity.8yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW I have work in less than an hour, an incredibly sensitive digestive system, and I just realized I had a bag of prunes and a pot of coffee without thinking.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW I noticed that I had accidentally left a tube of lipstick in the washing machine but the cap stayed on and all my clothes are fine.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW a bunch of influential and established local comedians curse out this one misogynist comedian who claimed that not liking rape jokes is a threat to free speech. They even went as far to tell him that his standup is terrible.8yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I have been working on this drawing of a chimpanzee that has appeared in a couple of my dreams.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/creepy
Octopus with roasted potatoes, pimiento peppers, and onions from Atari Gastroteka in San Sebastian, Spain10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/food
I got very drunk and painted Tina as a Like A Virgin Era Madonna11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/BobsBurgers
Back in the dating game after getting out of a three year long relationship and I already managed to scare off one very attractive guy by mentioning the breakup. At least he was attractive.8yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollYChromosome
HIF as a humble graphic designer, speaking up at meetings10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I just woke up from a dream where I pulled a giant wet clump of hair out of my vagina.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I somehow managed to create a Lime Hitler Stalin Pol Pot Ted Bundy Crimes Against Humanity dupe container!9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/muacirclejerk
MFW we are in public and I try to discreetly let my boyfriend know that I am in the mood.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
When I have to go about my day as though I am not currently dealing with intense cramps.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I ordered what I thought would be a small side of guacamole and it turned out to be two pounds. I ate half of it with a spoon and now it hurts to move.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW a woman told me that we bleed only around a teaspoon of blood on our periods.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
Everyone here posts their graceful and handsome Maine Coons. Meanwhile, I got Sophie.8yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/mainecoons
I've been stuck on the toilet for twenty minutes because my leg is asleep from being on the toilet for an hour. This will be my life from now on.8yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW I come home from a long shift to see that my brother has eaten the macaroni and cheese I had made last night.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
Whenever I delete a post that is getting a lot of down votes10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW my SO proposed that instead of just continuing to fight over one comforter, we just each have our own.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
My BF of three years and I broke up less than a week ago and I had to console him and ensure him that he is going to find the right woman one day.8yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW my SO tells me that I have officially converted him into a total cat person!9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
My running shoes are designed in a way that makes me have to stop every ten minutes to pick out the small rocks10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/mildlyinfuriating
Somebody is going through all my posts to down vote all my comments and posts.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
How I feel whenever a post of mine gets at least 20 upvotes10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
For some reason, I just remembered and visualized all the awkward sex with my misogynist ex of two years.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
Vegan pizza with roasted garlic spread, roasted mushrooms, daim mozzarella, and topped with arugula and strawberry balsamic glaze.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/vegan
She's an asshole that doesn't let us brush her so she gets sedated and shaved.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/cats
MRW I told my friend that he should not hook up with this woman because she sexually assaulted a guy in the past and he told me that that didn't bother him.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollYChromosome
Finally found out what that slip of paper from George H.W. Bush's lost memoir said.8yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
MRW I have given up chasing after my super skittish cat that I just want to cuddle with10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
Every month, when I have stocked up a surplus of feminine products in preparation for shark week...10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW I get into what I assume is a friendly debate and then get accused of being angry but can't get angry at that sexist accusation because they would only see as further proof that I cannot control my emotions.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
This is Sophie, I got her as a birthday gift when I was 11. 13 years later and she's still my best friend.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/cats
MRW my old elementary school bully who began harassing me on Facebook blocked me.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
The guy on this tea can looks very familiar but I just can't put my Rowsdower on it...10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/MST3K
When my dad said that Orange is the New Black is a show made for straight men.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW when I learned that the non-profit I used to intern at is hiring me to paint a mural of or inspired by Malala Yousafzai at their headquarters!10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW I see the comments section of a post about a man being gang raped to death and it's all jokes making fun of the victim.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollYChromosome
My apologies if you're getting sick of these but here is mine. (Hungary, Italy, and Ashkenazi)9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/vexillology
MRW I finished calculating all the calories I had just consumed in one meal on MyFitnessPal10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
What it feels like staying at my SO's parent's house that is always stocked up with candy, cake, beer, ice cream, guacamole, tortilla chips, and cheese.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
Whenever I see that someone who posts their progress to r/loseit or r/progresspics is a contributor to FPH9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I'm so excited to watch our soccer game tonight! So America, good luck!10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
Look what I found in my dorm building's give and take box. A two course meal!11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/shittyfoodporn
I know it's a bit late but here's my pop art makeup (minus the yellow wig)11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/MakeupAddiction
I finally moved out of my parent's house and across the country about a month ago. I miss my cats so much that I am thinking about purchasing a stuffed cat just to fill the void.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I made some vegan paprikash and I think it holds up in creaminess and in flavor.9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/vegan
How I felt (as a person of Italian heritage) when some people stated that it was stupid that Pantone/Sephora named their color of the year after a chicken dish10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollMUA
When I had to hurry up getting ready for work because I spent too long watching tear jerking animal videos.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
HIFW when I learned how to make the elevator go straight to my office on the 19th floor without stopping along the way10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I didn't own a fork so I finally decided to put my studio art education to some use.11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/shittyfoodporn
HIF Whenever I apply delicious smelling coconut oil to my face at night.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
What it feels like whenever I share a great moment with another TrollXer on a different subreddit.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW, as a Spongebob fan trying to save money, seeing an ad for the Spongebob themed reddit gifts exchange10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
M(bf's)RW we are trapped in a car in the freezing weather overnight and all I seem to care about are the stray kittens that keep running past our car.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I just found the PERFECT nude lipstick and it's only 3.49!10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
HIF after eating half of the giant pumpkin Danish pastry 10 minutes after my mom brought it home.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I'm trying to lose some weight and today, my brother has bought a liter of wine, made fried pork chops, and is now baking a chocolate fucking cake...10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
MRW I'm having a pleasant jog on a wooded path and all of sudden, it gets dark and I run home as fast as I can.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
If you don't have this in your pantry, I recommend going out and getting some. It's makes plain noodles delicious when I'm too tired to really cook anything9yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/vegan
A nice run in the lush woods along the Accotink Creek -Fairfax County, VA10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/runningroutes
My reaction whenever the guy who forced himself on me talks about how anybody who commits sexual assault should be put to death.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
This Croation cat show judge could not possibly look more like a villain11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/pics
My psychiatrist, who is the only person I feel like I can trust with my issues, is out for 6 months due to surgery and at the same time, my depression is now at its worst. This is me telling myself that it will be okay.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
From my local adoption agency's Facebook page. Somebody is clearly bitter about not being adopted.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/cats
MRW I was told that I cannot give blood for a year because I was in Cancun for less than a week.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
I found this beetle in the parking lot of a hospital. What is it and where is it from?11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/whatisthisthing
MRW on my walk, the guy who honked his horn and catcalled at me parks his car right in front of where I'm walking.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
My reaction after I found the Facebook profiles of a bunch of Red Pillers and got to see that the people behind that movement really live up to their stereotype.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/TrollXChromosomes
Ever since we had our 12 year old Maine Coon shaved, she gets cold quite often10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/aww
Made a giant molasses cookie shaped like America. Tasted like liberty, burnt and impossible to chew liberty.10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/shittyfoodporn
I, a jobless person, just turned down a job that would have paid 25k because it has nothing to do with my career aspirations, I would have to continue living with my parents for another year when I'm desperate to move out. Did I do the right thing?10yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/AskTrollX
I learned that unused pantyhose are good makeshift cheesecloths so I tried it out. With a white liquid dripping from it, this hung in my kitchen for hours.11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/pics
The woman sitting next to me on the plane gave this a weird look for ripping a page out of the SkyMall catalogue but I just had to have this picture of a cat sitting on a toilet.11yr ⋅ Sturgeon_Swimulator ⋅ r/cats
