The makers of the Michael Jackson documentary “Leaving Neverland” already have a new project.5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
This is 20% luck, 0% skill, 50% Colin Quinn and Jerky Boys steals. 10% trannies, 20% AIDS, and why the fuck does Ozzy not remember my name?!?! Tss!!!5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
“Comedy is...how do I say it? It’s a craft. It’s not something anybody can do. Regular people, civilians we say, just don’t get the artistry required. Beneath the humor, we’re philosophers, social commentators, the tortured poets of the 21st century. Lauren, could you pass me my box of funny hats?”5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
The Podacast We Can’t Talk About - AKA The REAL Chip Chipperson5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
Hi, I’m Jim Norton. I like to blow my friends under my porch, make hookers shit on me, and get ravaged by Nordic transsexuals. But enough about me, let’s talk about your ex-boyfriend. How big was his cock? Was it bigger than my cock? No don’t kiss me, there’s wine on your lips and I’m an alcoholic!6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
Jim Norton in his big screen debut, “From Oslo With Love”6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
Dude, Louis, I GENUINELY wasn’t trying to MOTHERFUCK you man. Believe me, I WOULD TELL YOU if I was. I never even HEARD the accusations against you. I might have read the first bit of the Times article, but I don’t remember. Anyways, I think the circumstances are right for me to come back on Louie.6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
I caught her meeting someone...who she shouldn’t have been meeting...it’s been rough man, real rough (wipes tears)6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
“Yes, what is it now Colin? I’m very busy at the moment. No, why would I be visiting them? I’m at the club with Mary Jean. Will I come to your premiere tonight? I dunno, what’s in it for me?”5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
TFW you’re asked to be a pallbearer at your dear friends funeral, but you’d rather get drunk and fingerblast passed out teenagers5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
A Tunisian immigrant disfigured in an acid attack explores his homosexuality with an intriguing young trans girl in...”Sue Is The Warmest Color.”6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
Hey Nana, we’d love a rundown of the sexual services you procured from Sue. If you won’t tell us, maybe one of your friends or family will.6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
YOU KNOW WHAT DUDE, I CAN HANG OUT WITH MY KID ANY DAY, BUT THE MCRIB COMES AROUND ONLY ONCE A YEAR, DUDE!5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
The notorious SAMCRO Joe on his activities at the Big Apple Ranch: “it’s not a hobby, it’s a passion.”5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
“Yeaahh man, like, once they learn more about the brain and shit, we won’t even need porn anymore, dude. We’ll just be able to fucking cum and orgasm on demand, you know?” (twitch twitch) “We won’t need any of that physical or emotional intimacy shit either, we can just fucking CUM.” (arm spasms)6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
This man has been funnier in the past four months than Ant or Jim have been in the last four years.6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
An Algerian fish monger, preparing to marry his 14 year old bride, smiles for the camera. National Geographic, Sept. 1998.6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
Haha! You losers are just jealous of how much fun I’m having tweeting 200 times a day in between the Bud Light hangovers and Xanax blackouts! Now back to obscurity with you! 😂😂😂😂6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
This is Pastor Tony Cumia and his wife Dawn. For years, he decried homosexuality and trans people in the name of “traditional family values,” until he was caught on Grindr sexting a trans camgirl named Sue Lightning. Sent back to obscurity by his congregation, he hanged himself early this morning.6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
“Actually, I’d love to go out to dinner with you, talk about stuff, maybe kiss you ;)”6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
Brother Joe's U2 Cover Band 2 Sue Set to Release New Album6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
“Dude, Ariana, I GENUINELY didn’t send pics of us fucking to Mac Miller. I never even SAW the nudes you sent me. I might have fapped to them once, but I don’t remember. Anyways, this is just SCUMBAGS on tumblr trying to start shit. I’m not even lying, I would absolutely tell you if I was lying.”6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
“She’s 25!?!? You SCUMBAG, are you trying to motherfuck me!?!? You want me to date a 25 year old woman who doesn’t even have a DICK?!? You think that’s the best I can do?!? I deserve them not a day over 20, and they’d better enjoy porn and eating like a bulimic teenager!!!” (Spits on floor)5yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
REMINDER: Not only does Joseph Cumia frequent a gay nightclub, he frequents a gay nightclub where the attendees cosplay as cowboys (actual pic from their google page).6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
“I’m just around so much MASCULINE ENERGY, man, I just NEED to get away sometimes, you know? Some SCUMBAGS think I use my job to surround myself with hot women like Kelsey, my trainer, and porno guests, but it’s GENUINELY not sexual, man, HONESTLY. When’s Mary Jean getting here so I can ‘fill up’?”6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
“Yeah, that’s a tough one man. On the one hand, it takes a real SSSSCUMBAG to MOTHERFUCK a guy who made a brilliant documentary, but on the other hand, you’re a spineless attention whore desperate for two seconds of recognition from a celebrity you hate. It’s tough man, it’s a real problem (sigh)”6yr ⋅ ProfessorChipperson ⋅ r/opieandanthony
