Overheard this from a second-grader this morning
My wife's reaction when I unexpectedly do a household chore
Gets me every time.
There is something deeply infuriating about this
Coffee tip - this one really works
It's really no mystery why Porn Hub has a better video player than YouTube.
Moderation is not my strong point
Whatever you say....
This is what the penguin was made for
She gave up after about 40 minutes. Much anticlimactic awkwardness was had.
How it all got started
Wife left me a voice message to put the chicken in the oven at 250
One little space can be so important
Working in government
When my hot MILF neighbor asked me if I could plow her
Flattery works every time with the girls
When my MILF boss asks me whether I'm hard at work
Ordinary Muslim Man
Give her what she really wants for Valentine's Day.
Tech-savvy buddy of mine is 100% convinced of this
My thought upon seeing a text-free meme get over 33,000 upvotes in 5 hours
This is what really irks me
Shame on Oprah for unfairly playing the race card
Just because IT guys/mechanics/handymen etc. do things you can do yourself, doesn't automatically mean they are ripping people off.
When my wife suggested we have period sex
I guess you just can't fix stupid
It's less exciting when you're a guy
It's also a great ice-breaker.
And I don't even work in retail
To the girl who requested that all of the guys on here stop acting like creepers
Co-worker disagrees, what do you think?
As a kid, this was the epitome of happiness.
It's brilliant when you think about it
Is there something wrong with me?
Just take my word on this one
YES, AWESO....wait, what?
What this meme has become
I mean, we listen to songs we like over and over again, so what's the difference?
The silence from Obama and Sharpton (etc.) is absolutely deafening.
I think the way she is being treated is an injustice.
I do feel a bit guilty
I just don't get it
I will not allow a bathroom fixture to dictate my personal hygiene.
These brave heroes need more recognition
Not sure where this really belongs....but it needs to be seen wide and far
It will serve them far better in real life
His generosity knows no bounds
My 1st grader tells me his friend's father sells coke
Should probably make a throwaway for this one
Yeah, I'm going there
This is NOT a judgment - just an observation of the reality.
Let's get real here, girls
I don't regret it.
Sudden Clarity Clarence
Sesame Street Disorders
House of Representatives?
Maybe it's just me....
Calling it twerking doesn't change anything, honestly
When my wife closes her eyes during sex
Seems like a scam
Well played, Google. Well played.
Unpopular Opinion Puffin
I don't know much about cars but this seems a bit extreme.
I mean, the end has been achieved, so as long as she doesn't make a display of being disgusted by it....who really cares?
Every time I go to the mall
Oldie butt goodie.