“Did you see that? The Indian?” “Who, Kevin? Of course I have. We picked him up at the rest station an hour ago.”2yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
“Yo Doug, I need a diamond. Doesn’t have to be big, just make it flawless. That friend price? You let me down, Doug! Imma call NYC! Gonna get my Hebrews on this!”1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
“Wait, this turns people invisible? Who needs to be invisible in the middle of nowhere?! Where were you when I farted at Danny’s wedding?”1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
“Stop trying to control everything!”| “I don’t do that!”| “Stan, you’re holding a gun to God’s head. I mean, I can’t even think of a metaphor that’s better than this.”1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
Oh, I gotta take this. It’s my ‘aclowntant’. Y’know, a clown-accountant? He’s got this giant calculator that only ever adds up to ‘boobs.’ Pretty funny, but frankly I think he’s been stealing from me.1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
And in this one, the player wouldn’t control me, ‘cause YOU CAN’T CONTROL ME!1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/HomestarRunner
“Okay, I just realized your laser guns aren’t real. So, I have a new strategy, and you’re just gonna have to trust me on this: die for me. Die. For me. Okay? Any questions?”2yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
“Great! Let’s have them over for Shabbos!” “Shh! Keep your voice down, we’re at the club!”2yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
You! Give this man your best trouser-arouser. And you! Strangle me while I brush your hair.1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
There are two recurring characters in this show that are Jewish. Francine Smith is not one of them. I could not stop laughing.1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/Judaism
Hey all, I’m generally more of an “American Dadder” but I find this to be the funniest joke in family guy, just my opinion.2yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/familyguy
The dumbfounded stares the boys have during Lewis’ classic “dear math bitch” but is priceless.1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
Here’s a condom. Don’t use it, do what I do: pretend to put it on, then hide it in your poop cannon. Let’s boogie!1yr ⋅ No_Atmosphere2677 ⋅ r/americandad
