Did you ever get the feeling you're only goin' with girls 'cause you're supposed to?1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/futurama
Ooh, sounds delish! Let me just toss some jeans on and – wait a minute! Who is this?!2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Dear Lisa, as write this, I am very sad. Our president has been overthrown...(man's voice) and replaced by the benevolent General Krull! All hail Krull, and his glorious new regime! Sincerely, little girl2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Aw, can't I come home later? There's not going to be a home later. Oh, okay.2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Only who can prevent forest fires?...You have selected 'You', referring to me, that is incorrect. The correct answer is you!2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Uhh, Mr. President, sir. People are getting a bit confused about the way you and your opponent are... well... constantly holding hands.2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Week of Willie Day 6; Willie please, Mr. Van Houten has the floor.1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
It's your heart, and I think it's on its last thump. Phew, I was afraid it was my transmission.2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
If you leave milk out, it can go sour. Put it in the refrigerator, or, failing that, a cool, wet sack.2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Slow down, this sidewalks for regular walking, not for fancy walking.1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
I know how you feel, Bart. When I was your age, I wanted an electric football game more than anything in the world. My parents bought it for me, and it was the happiest day of my life...2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
🎵 I feel like chicken tonight, like chicken tonight, like chicken tonight 🎵1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Gonna paint your wagon, gonna paint it fine, gonna use oil-based paint, cause the wood is pine2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
All the laughs in the world won't protect you from the stern discipline of the Baron.1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Week of Willie Last Day; If I don't save the wee turtles, who will?1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Hawaii? What about Hawaii? Moe, who's going to Hawaii? Am I going to Hawaii?1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Eww, Homer where did you get that ugly thing? Why at that little shop right over...there...(gasp!)...Oh no wait, it was over there.2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
How can Ace be one AND eleven, huh? What kinda God would allow that?2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Beating Jury Duty: The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
And guess who's been practicing medicine without a license...That's right, Homer Simpson.1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Miss Simpson, do you find something funny about the word tromboner?2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
If you'll stand up please and give me a big smile. Oh no no no, not that big.1yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/seinfeld
See it goes one mouse, two mouse, one bird, two bird, then one dog, then two dog. I hear there's a guy up in Portland with three dogs, but that's probably just an office rumor.2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/americandad
It says here that you've been pre-declined for every major credit card. It also says you once grabbed a dog by the hind legs and pushed him around like a vacuum cleaner.2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
It features two-pronged wall plug, pre-molded hand grip well, durable outer casing to prevent fall apart...2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/TheSimpsons
Somebody, please! My name is Clive Trotter and I'm an American and I am in trouble!2yr ⋅ Lance-Murdock ⋅ r/americandad
