You always have enough cash in your pocket for your change to be $420.693yr ⋅ BigDaddyGibbby ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can memorize all of pi’s digits, but not their order3yr ⋅ my_only_good_account ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
The ability to summon anyone's mom for any mom related comeback.3yr ⋅ Tornado9797 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can post anything to shitty super powers and get upvotes because you attached a picture3yr ⋅ chris_tha_great ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can put slices of meat into DVD players and it will play the whole life of the creature.3yr ⋅ deus_agni ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can turn yourself and all your clothes invisible, except your jeans3yr ⋅ TrustYourSenpai ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can instantly teleport yourself to this location, but not from it.3yr ⋅ Grimmjoww252 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can summon and banish this. It will not attack you, that is all the control you have over it. It hates being called a bird, it prefers being called “Musculoraptor.”3yr ⋅ TheronEpic ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can stare at people so hard that they have to pick up litter.3yr ⋅ Geek54250 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can pinch and stretch any image or text you can touch like you can on a smartphone, but only when you're high AF3yr ⋅ fritzys_paradigm ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can be invisible below the waist. Shoes are still visible though.3yr ⋅ Adaman1324 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can cremate yourself on will whenever you want (only once of course)3yr ⋅ -_-WaTeR-_- ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can alter your skeleton in any shape you want, but only when you are consuming the mayonnaise.3yr ⋅ RealViperSnek ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
When you die, the WatchMojo lady narrates the top 10 moments of your life as they flash before your eyes3yr ⋅ t001_t1m3 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
Your dick is the ultimate fighting machine (this was literally the order I found this in)3yr ⋅ Curse_the_food ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
People with arthritis have a loyal servant called Arthur who writes everything for them.3yr ⋅ Redwood459 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You’re extraordinarily handsome, but only when you have air pods in3yr ⋅ sweezy_inman ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can make people’s double chests in minecraft to look like this3yr ⋅ Jim_and_Nic ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can use 99% of the toilet paper to wipe shit, so one roll lasts you for an entire year.3yr ⋅ wafflz ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can levitate 23 sausages for 4 seconds. Refills every thursday.3yr ⋅ EliminatedHatred ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
If you're ever low on space, a dog can give your computer a megabyte3yr ⋅ awesomea04 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can shift your legs to replace your arms and your arms to replace your legs. Accessories, including gun, not included.3yr ⋅ TheronEpic ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can summon and banish this thing at will. It shoots legs. You may enter the tank but not control it, although you may talk to it, and it may choose to comply.3yr ⋅ TheronEpic ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You have a 100% chance of a grenade hitting a teacher if you tell yeet3yr ⋅ Centipede6942011 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can shoot bullets out of your mouth but all they do it make people christain3yr ⋅ GarfieldFutanari ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You have superhuman strength but only when you're squeezing lemons3yr ⋅ 66Void66 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can throw yourself across any room without being electrocuted3yr ⋅ Jatbat53 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You know exactly how many chocolate chips there are in any house you're in.3yr ⋅ PM_PICS_OF_U_SMILING ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can summon a clone, who will eat a watermelon with you and dissapear afterwards3yr ⋅ UltimateDragonDildo ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You have free High-Speed Internet when you raise your eyebrows.3yr ⋅ Run_For_Your_Life ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can locate any person as long as you use your dick to do it3yr ⋅ edgyusernamebro ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can make any poster in any elementary school or daycare look like this.3yr ⋅ Waluinguini ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
Whenever you walk into a room the Law and Order sound is played in people's head3yr ⋅ BlueLibrary ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
Everytime water shoots up your ass, it sprays out of your mouth. (Picture to show)3yr ⋅ thenintenkid ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can restore amputated hands with Garnier Ultimate Blends hand restoring creamTM3yr ⋅ okkokkoX ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can kill literally anything with one punch but everything can also kill you with one punch3yr ⋅ ArdSkellige89 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
you have the ability to change gender near an oncean, a lake, a pool, etc.3yr ⋅ SomeRedditerOnline ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
you can turn into a mustache if the people in front of you look at their feet3yr ⋅ TBM-TAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
You can hold your foreskin shut while peeing to release a charged shot3yr ⋅ awesomea04 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
Whenever you're close to a connected light and you clap to shut it down, a monkey butler will pop out of nowhere and shut it down manually for you.3yr ⋅ Jaeger767 ⋅ r/shittysuperpowers
