Help a humanities prof out

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My empty virtual office hours right now. These little moments of peace keep me smiling through the chaos. Hang in there friends.

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The AUDACITY.

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It’s Almost that Time of the Semester..,

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Teacher of the Year

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'Tis the season of Grade Grubbing, Fa la la la la, la la la la

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Beat them at their own game!

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Went on campus for the first time since March and there is no preparation whatsoever for on-ground instruction. We have students in less than two weeks.

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Dress for the job you want

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I love the spirit of this! Would it fly?

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/serious question

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Am I missing all the good stuff?

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My inbox explained

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Pinned up for motivation: A rejection letter for work that later won a Nobel prize.

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Sums it up

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The comments helped me understand why so many college students send emails asking for grade bumps...

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Funny/ Not funny

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we’ve all got to pitch in and do our part

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Just finished grading midterms. What kind of distribution is this? (Never seen anything like this in 10 years!)

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I made this for myself in preparation of what is to come.

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Class of 2022, Chernihiv, Ukraine

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Final grades have been calculated and submitted.

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Colleagues keep mistaking me for a student. Do I need to wear a suit?

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And feign enthusiasm we will!

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When that summer course/overload money comes in.....

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I am tired.

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Freud knew how to lecture

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All NeuroImage editors have resigned over publication fee (set by Elsevier at ~$3.5k) and are starting nonprofit journal: Imaging Neuroscience

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Growing your humanities department.

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Someone left this out in our staff room.

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I’m leaving Reddit. Thanks for all the fish.

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Everybody is catching up before semester’s end.

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Remember when presentations gave us motion sickness?

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When procrastination wins.

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Grade distribution for a distance learning engineering class

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The syllabus is in the mail

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Last week I emailed my instructor explaining why I had to miss class and asked what I had missed. This is what I received in class today.

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Outside the learning chamber

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Colleagues: It's that time of year again!

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This would be a difficult email to answer, and I understand that catching up that much is hard, but that is a such a terrible way to respond right?

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Recognition

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College Excellence Award for Excellence

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Grading midterms and this made me smile.

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Best Instructor Buddy Made a Meme

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US and UK Professors, on modifying a course

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Nursing students fail to do Grade 2 measurement . How can we support these aspiring students?

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When I screw up a recorded lecture

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Sometimes...I just want to say this to students.

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Has anyone tried this? I’m tempted.

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Accurate.

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Totally using this in my stats class this week.

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A colleague retired March 2020 and I put this up on her office door as an April fools joke. It’s still there are dean hasn’t noticed.

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Once upon a time, I took a stand-up comedy class to help with my classroom technique. I did well enough to continue on the comedy circuit for over half a decade. What interesting thing have you done apart from being a professor that helped (expectedly or un-)?

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I’ll see your syllabus t-shirt and raise you an Effin’ Birds mug

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I just created a new course! Now we are one of the few social work programs that offers a disability course.

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My student unknowingly added a TL;DR at the end of an email, and I love it.

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professors on r/professors vs irl [meta]

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I am the professor that responds to students between 8 pm and 2 am haha

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Maybe I’m the only one annoyed by this.

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I need to teach winter classes more often. (This is midterm posting)

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I sent this to my professor along with the homework

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Ned's a bit disconnected from academic reality.

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This is a first-graduate level course (insert Jackie Chan meme)

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This is considered savage?

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Why are the mods attempting to reveal the identities of subreddit members?

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When your discipline is featured on Netflix.

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They're probably not amused, but I am.

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Just a little longer...

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Y’all may not appreciate this as much as I do (no one does) but “Strange guys [sic] was ok” encapsulates my whole life so compactly... I can’t stop laughing

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GPT Zero false flagging human written papers.

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Peer review

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It’s like seeing my students: “What on earth have I (not) done”

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The Hulk

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This

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My colleagues are busy creating engaging online content while I’m over here drinking scotch & figuring out how to make the rest of this crappy semester as stress-free as possible for all parties involved. Here’s one idea:

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After the last year-and-a-half of exhaustion, and hustling out papers, and saving every scrap of everything I've ever done, and waking up and immediately puking from anxiety, and bracing for the absolute worst, yeah this is how I'm choosing to announce it.

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Going from giving painstaking comprehensive feedback on final papers to reviewing evaluations:

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I thought that those of you that are also geriatric millennials or Gen X might appreciate my new sticker!

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Genius!

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Saw this on r/all. I can only hope this happens for me.

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The truth hurts.

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Saw this on a friend's Facebook, curious about the response from this community.

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I never got such a madlad Professor. [x-post r/madlads]

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Just got this email from a student that took my class in the Summer of 2019. I am tempted to go with the last suggested reply.

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Walked into class today to this note. Think I'll use this image as my response in the future any time a student asks what it's like being a professor.

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In a twist of events, my dog ate my STUDENT’S homework.

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Initial post was probably a professor haha

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Literally every syllabus

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Just me?

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Are accomodations requests getting more unreasonable by the day?

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Scumbag college president

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Since it's that time of the semester!

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Victim mentality

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Re-reading Interesting times by Sir Terry Pratchett and came across this passage, still a fitting description of Higher Education.

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From a university course textbook

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Found an internship opportunity only for individuals with current faculty positions....

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Worried about burnout? Don't bother trying to fix the reasons why, just replace them using our new careers page! Real nice Inside Higher Ed...

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Yay, someone left markers in the whiteboard tray. Oh, wait.

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Happy Coronaversary! This came on TV exactly a year ago

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Spring Break

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So relatable.

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Anyone else have students doing weird things in zoom?

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Do students think we can just give any random person a grade? Got this from a student registered last semester for my class; never showed up, never did any work.

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Me too, comrade, me too.

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Raise your hand if this is true for you: I can't even get them to read my syllabus and right-wingers think we have the power to brainwash students?

2yr ⋅

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Bizarre instance of plagiarism. Student copied and pasted large excerpts from an essay on a paper mill site, then cited that paper as a reference. Turnitin didn't identify the plagiarism, but I did, only because the student pointed me straight to the original source.

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Posting grades on the last day of the semester, and then leaving that uni for another

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Grading papers that start with Throughout the history of time, have basic grammar errors throughout, no thesis, and no citations:

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Stole this from a faculty friend on FB

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I would have edited it out, but maybe it’s better to leave fairy barbie in

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Confess Your College Sin here to ring in the new year

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This has always been my scheduling strategy

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I've come to accept some things about myself

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I love surprises! Like finding out *during the exam* that Question Titles are not displayed to the students! #FireBlackboardIntoTheSun

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All I get are worried emails and exasperated sighs...

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July 13, 1793: Jean-Paul Marat, one of the most outspoken leaders of the French Revolution, is stabbed to death in his bath.

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We are being evaluated using the same criteria as talk show hosts and circus clowns

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How we avoid grading!

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Tried to crosspost this but couldn’t: This is a table at Warby Parker made specifically to hold those books. As a college English instructor, this is probably the closest I’ve ever felt to feeling like I’m looking at actual porn when what I’m looking at is not pornographic at all.

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Uh-oh, they’ve figured us out!

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Are memes allowed? Because making this one was a bit therapeutic

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Spring break should have been a month ago...

3yr ⋅

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I Think I Would Die Laughing if a Student Said This. Might Even Give Extra Credit for Making Me Laugh 😂

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I would love to be able to drop a class I was teaching, especially if this happened

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Which of you did this?

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For extra credit, students can find my office and take a picture. This is the best submission I've received

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It’s DONE, this semester is over, and the TA is sitting in my chair so no more work even if I wanted to.

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Not the professor we need, but the one we deserve

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Bliss is an empty LMS queue

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So sick of these types of answers.

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Here’s my teaching philosophy summed up in this email

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When I open my summer online course after neglecting it for two weeks.

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An actual sentence I encountered.

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It’s conference season!!!

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What Midjourney thinks professors look like, based on their department

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I think my closed captions are trying to tell me something...

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Chegg

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Just a few more weeks....

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For those with an additional week of Spring Break

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Let’s hear it

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The future is now!

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Is it just me, or do a lot of 50 + male professors seem to be going for this look? The black shirt with just a tad too many buttons undone?

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As if you could resist...

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Perhaps if tuition was affordable students wouldn’t need “insurance to protect their investment”

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Went on RMP, so much to unpack! Really have to study!

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⚠️trigger warning⚠️

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