You are perusing the local GameStop looking for some new anime dating simulators to purchase, when you encounter The Game Master he walks up to you and says You are not a real gamer and stomps his foot on the ground, what dew you dew?

1yr ⋅ ⋅

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While on your journey you encounter the stash of a mighty brewmaster, the cache seems abandoned. How do you proceed?

4yr ⋅

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Welcome to the far east sunflower fields of Elysium. A band of fighters from the far east lands materializes. They demend tendies and dewies or you must commit sudoku. What do, fair traveler?

5yr ⋅

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You met the fearsome Beefist while wandering around in Tailgate village! What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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You‘ve heard of the rumored, perfect m‘lady, but she lives in lands far away. How will you snatch her from her distant prison to settle your deep desire for the 3D?

4yr ⋅

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Choose your fighter. I’m choosing Caned Cleric on the left

3yr ⋅

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You are handed a pornographic magazine of someone you wish could be by a fellow neckbeard, What do you do?

3yr ⋅

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The entrance to Tendie Town is blocked by these robust m’goodboys. What dew you dew ?

2yr ⋅

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During a raid on the Chadlands, you rescued (captured) this Stacy and brought her back to your basement fortress. She seems to have taken a liking to you (i.e. Stockholm Syndrome). Unfortunately, the Chads have laid siege to your basement in an attempt to rescue her. What do you do?

4yr ⋅

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You encounter The Warrior Of High metabolism, he offers you a fruit punch soda, what dew you dew?

1yr ⋅

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Facing this land's new ruler

7yr ⋅

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You are lost in the woods. It’s dark, and your tendie stash and Dew have been gone for hours. You feel darkness coming over you and collapse. You awaken some time later to a smell of musty herbs. “Hey big guy, I thought you were a goner.” You’re in the camp of the Kush Druid. What do you do?

3yr ⋅

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At long last you meet the BBEG standing between you and the grandest loot.

4yr ⋅

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You find all the DEW in the land has been confiscated and now considered contraband . You find out that the council of cola in a mad grab of power has seized all shipments of the dewy delight. What dew do you dew?

3yr ⋅

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Oh shit! You have been ambushed by a Deo-D, the infamous mercenary! He is here to erase your healthy musk! What dew you dew?!

2yr ⋅

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You return from your questing for tendies at the local Walmart only to discover a vile Chad has claimed your throne and is scrolling through your collection of questionably aged waifus, what dew you dew?

2yr ⋅

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You encounter a patrolperson of the state

4yr ⋅

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Hidden beneath the Deep Roads, you discover the lair of an ancient dwarven sage. The sheer stench of his power overwhelms your senses. He offers you a question - answer correctly, and you will be rewarded; but fail, and feel his wrath. Answer, adventurer: What is the Riddle of Tendies?

5yr ⋅

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I hope that this isn’t a repost

5yr ⋅

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You enter a fellow neckbeard's nest to find the owner, however there is something off about him, but you sure why.

4yr ⋅

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Strange enchantress attempts to lure unsuspecting victims into casting spells

4yr ⋅

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The Maiden of Gaming has a request gentle sir

4yr ⋅

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You are faced with a fateful decision. The choice is yours, traveller.

5yr ⋅

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You are Battling Hunger After a Long Battle. You see This Merchant in the Next Town, what do you do?

3yr ⋅

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“You think you’re the only one who studied the blade?”

1yr ⋅

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Deep in the forest, you run into two Kekistani soldiers! They seem to be on a mission...

2yr ⋅

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While spelunking in the Sega Caves, you encounter this exotic temptress of the lupine form. She promises an eternity of ecstacy in exchange for your complete abandonment of tendies and mussy. What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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Your waifu has betrayed you and called in air support!

1yr ⋅

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During your long journey through the virgin valley you encounter the mt'lady. It groans: Thy shall not pass unless you make a sacrifice of one fo your most prized possessions. What dew you dew?

2yr ⋅

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Having never known father and using mother as nothing more than a tendie cook upon to unload your frustrations, you never truly appreciated lineage. Faced with a third generation Chadian warrior, you realize the strength in heritage and discipline are more than anticipated. How do you prevail?

5yr ⋅

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Mystery potion. Drinking it applies a random effect.

2yr ⋅

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You arrive at the Mountain of Maggots.

4yr ⋅

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Invaders from the lands of furries march toward neckbeardia, dew you fight or join them?

2yr ⋅

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deep undercover, attempting to infiltrate and destroy from within the Thundercock Empire - a fellow Kyle invites you to his treasury in order to boast about his vast collection of artifacts that very nearly make his drywall punch unstoppable. those would definitely impress other Chads...

4yr ⋅

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Upon approaching the Tendie Tavern, a Faygo Troll demands payment. How do you proceed?

4yr ⋅

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You thought it was impossible, but you’ve finally found her. A m’lady who could be your equal as a warrior.

3yr ⋅

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Cries in virgin

5yr ⋅

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After hours of swiping, searching for a party member to restock your tendies supply, you stumble across a warrior who seems determined to cross blades.

5yr ⋅

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You fail the charisma check and find that 2D girls can reject your advances just as harshly as 3D ones.

4yr ⋅

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You enter the local Temple of Delphine, where the Grand Wizard insults your waifu and insists you convert. As you draw steel, he invokes powerful magic. Knowing it gives him a powerful advantage, do you fight or flee?

4yr ⋅

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A Neckbeard-Chad hybrid DEMANDS that you hand over your tendies or the waifu gets it. What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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Flame Katana, The Forbidden Weapon

2yr ⋅

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You’ve defeated a powerful gypsy witch in a tavern game and won her prized tarot card. This will fetch a hefty sum back in Tendy Town, but beware, for gypsies are known to curse their treasures.

4yr ⋅

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While strolling in the holy land of Nintendo you find an artifact most powerful

3yr ⋅

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The Nacho Succubus appears before you, her seductive wiles laced with cheesy, tangy, dusty goodness. What dew you dew?

2yr ⋅

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After dispatching some Incel scouts, you find a strange device, ideal for capturing images of elusive waifus.

4yr ⋅

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You need to get mom's car fixed to flee Chad's wrath, but the mechanic has little respect for your noble pursuits.

5yr ⋅

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You defeat the bandits but alone stands their leader unwilling to surrender as he promised to return to Sakaki from Fruit of Grisaia

4yr ⋅

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As you enter a small cabin, your path is blocked by bladeulous, master of daggers, do you flee or fight?

5yr ⋅

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As you explore the deep caverns of Wifeu island you spot a treasure unknown by your kind, radiating a mysterious aura. Do you take it adventurer?

2yr ⋅

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You encounter: a faire Nippon female in the clutches of a fictional man...

4yr ⋅

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You have discovered brand-new fire magic!

2yr ⋅

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You finally find the quest objective. Cut it down with nothing but your blade to prove your worth as a chivalrous swordsman.

3yr ⋅

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Hark unto me Gentlesirs! Our great King has disappeared and his throne sits empty. He must be found lest our kingdom come to ruin - who will answer the call?

4yr ⋅

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A powerful combat robot arrives to put an end to you.

5yr ⋅

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Please share strategies and tips with your fellow gentlesirs on how to beat this boss.

3yr ⋅

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Aquarius, Lord of the Sea

5yr ⋅

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Level 5 greaser approaches

5yr ⋅

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A gang member is guarding the path under the bridge

1yr ⋅

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While you were exploring the city you encountered a very stylish individual and his fashion advisor. He offers to sell you sunglasses. One for 20 tendies? What do you do?

4yr ⋅

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Chad Champion, the final boss.

6yr ⋅

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as you enter slavic lands, you encounter the legendary champion of the slavs

6yr ⋅

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While browsing the interwebz looking for hot singles in your area on your cum-stained gaming chair, you find the dating profile of friendzone_taco who lives near your local GameStop. His aura seems to pull you in... what do you dew?

1yr ⋅

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Ye have crossed paths with a member of the fabled 'Gaybeard' society!

10mo ⋅

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You study your disguise and are pleased. You can move amongst NPCs unnoticed.

5yr ⋅

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You are shopping in the local market for wares when a stunning maiden catches your eye, Not wanting to lose such a treasure you approach her. How do you entice such a voluptuous lady to have coitus with a gentleman such as yourself?

2yr ⋅

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M’laysia

5yr ⋅

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Cower before thy Beard of Enchanted Virtue.

5yr ⋅

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You meet the fabled raccoon of wisdom, what do you ask of him?

3yr ⋅

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You have survived the treacherous climb up Dew Mountain and now you have encountered the mysterious and elusive Mountain Dewggo, spirit of dew. What now?

3yr ⋅

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The king of the dew looks apon his newborn son. He knows he is looking at the future king and can't help but be full of pride.

5yr ⋅

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While exploring a nearby atheist church, you come across scholar rivaling the normie sheeple faith. The wise equestrian sage sits in his study, grinning to himself. As you come closer, he looks up from his work and glances over at you. What do you do?

4yr ⋅

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The m’ech has you in its sights.

5yr ⋅

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After finding a genie in a bottle of Dew, you wish for your waifu to be real. Upon seeing you she immediately backs away and draws her blade. How do you proceed?

4yr ⋅

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Bad ending - Chad emerges victorious

6yr ⋅

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You encounter the fabled Waifu Warriors. Knowing they are renowned as legendary combatants, you must choose your actions carefully. How do you proceed?

4yr ⋅

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HALT FAIR TRAVELER! *notices bulge* owo what’s this

5yr ⋅

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While strolling through The Forum Of The Snack Merchants, a warrior simply known as Speedy approaches you and challenges you to a duel! What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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On your way to Mount Trilby, your train is stopped by a well-armed bandit!

3yr ⋅

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You encounter a M'lady Swordsman at a cosplay convention! What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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M’lady has trained with her fists for much longer than you have been studying the blade.

5yr ⋅

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You find your waifu celebrating her birthday with someone else!

3yr ⋅

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As you make your way through the terror-infested village in Resident Evil VIII, you come across this strapping, healthy-framed goodboy. He will bequeath treasures to you in exchange for your tendies and mussy. What dew you purchase from him?

3yr ⋅

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At last you have discovered the treasure of the lost city of El Dewrado. You grab one can and take a much needed drink. The cans begin rumbling and a large dragon rises from beneath the mound, enraged that you have stolen from its hoard

5yr ⋅

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emerging from moms spider basement after defeating the eldritch neckbeard, the ground suddenly shakes and cracks open, as his final form, neckbeard mountain emerges from the earth, ripping the house apart, what dew?

1yr ⋅

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[Random Encounter] Calvin the White Mage, guardian of the northern woods. (Your HP is fully recovered!)

6yr ⋅

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You stand accused of ungentlemanly behaviour. State your crimes. Plead your case. The Council of Vermin will decide your fate.

4yr ⋅

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On your way to a tendie shop you meet the fabled Pizza Master. How do you proceed?

4yr ⋅

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After infiltrating a Chad village, you come across a fair maiden in trouble at the hands of Felix, a cruel Chad veteran. How do you proceed?

5yr ⋅

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Upon entering the SJW States you come across a roadblock.

5yr ⋅

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“That’s a nice blade, kid. But a true warrior is only as good as his training.”

5yr ⋅

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You stumble on the remains of a dark ritual after defeating a feminist witch. What is this dark cat up to? What do you do?

5yr ⋅

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You finally track down the hoarder of dew after hours of restless tracking. What do you do?

3yr ⋅

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The tavern is filled with an entire squad of veteran Queensguard. What to you do?

5yr ⋅

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You have an encounter with the fearsome pirate, Blackbeard! What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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Roses are red, this boss battle is tough,

5yr ⋅

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You come across the one and only nerf shuriken gun, only used by pro m'gentleninjas

3yr ⋅

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Please don't hurt Chad! He didn't mean anything to me! Unhand me wench, I serve only justice now!

7yr ⋅

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The Chonkodile guards its tendie hoard in the heart of the Dew Bayou.

2yr ⋅

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Before you can make sweet love to Stacy, you must face her father. You are stocked with tendies and Mountain Dew, but you fear they may not be enough.

5yr ⋅

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A radical movement has overtaken the old faith, and two students of this herecy challenge your authoriTAY with weapons drawn. What do you do? (if you guys see this, unironically love the vibe!)

1yr ⋅

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You continue north into the depths of the swamp. Something stirs in the murky water... and a foe crashes through the surface!

7yr ⋅

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You have skyrocketed into the moon to find the rare lunar dew, however, you have encountered a figure that strongly resembles the species who-shall-not-be-named. It looks like this entity is approaching you with curiosity, how should you greet them? Maybe try asking where is the lunar dew?

3yr ⋅

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Having ascended Vapesmoke Volcano, you come face to face with the Neckbeard Cloudmaster. He draws his serrated katana, and fruit-scented clouds begin to close in...

5yr ⋅

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A fellow neckbeard’s waifu has gone rogue and blocks your path! What dew you dew?

2yr ⋅

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Whilst travelling to the Brony convention you encounter this philosopher. He delivers his monologue and stares at you, awaiting a response. What dew you dew?

2yr ⋅

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The time portal opens, and out steps a medieval neckbeard. He looks at you with cold fury. “Ye are clearly a normie knave - prepare to face my wrath!” What do you do?

4yr ⋅

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While on your way to The Dungeon Of Diet to rescue some friends, a master enchanter blocks your path! What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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You finish winding the depths of the IT closet to find your treasure item atop a chest.

4yr ⋅

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They say there is one who practices the dark arts. Crosses line after line. But never did you expect to find yourself face to face with his horrors. You encounter... THE LAUNDROMANCER

3yr ⋅

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Chad attack!

7yr ⋅

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While dragging your waifu through the bazaar, her heat-transfer printed eye settles on this bewitching artifact. You are presently short on Good Boy Points, but you must admit it would brighten up the dorm.

5yr ⋅

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As you trudge through the bog in the dark of night, you hear a rustle and the metallic click of a weapon behind you. A thickly accented voice whispers in your ear, “What are you doing in my swamp?”

4yr ⋅

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The wereshiba attacks you with a heavy-handed swing!

5yr ⋅

⋅

A group of armed but beautiful anime m’ladies shows up at the edge of town. But when the gentlesirs arrive to tip their fedoras in welcoming, they open fire!

3yr ⋅

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Map of Neckbeardia - V2

6yr ⋅

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Your journey through a Con Settlement is brought to a halt by the Six Knights of Brony. They inform you that they have been contracted to end you. Do you fight or flee?

3yr ⋅

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A respectable and most fearsome elder of Neckbeardia, accompanied by his beardless squire, appears before you, your eyes enraptured by his healthy frame. He presents you with the most noble quest of acquiring a sacred power source for his most prized, most buxom, m'lday golem. What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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The smell of stale piss, Tendies, and dew call you to a hidden cave, you cautiously step in to the most glorious of Neckbeard Nests and you encounter The Evolved. He will answer one question

4yr ⋅

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While exploring a M’onestary in the mountains of glacial dew, you come upon a warrior wearing an ancient, legendary suit of armor. He seems contemplative, and does not seem to wish you harm. How do you proceed?

3yr ⋅

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Love how elixirs come in various sizes

1yr ⋅

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You encounter a blanket dwelling merchant in the wasp fields. What do you buy?

4yr ⋅

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Trial by combat

11mo ⋅

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POV: You come back home and your waifu has given you a meal, dew you except?

3yr ⋅

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Equipped weapon - p90 of waifuness

5yr ⋅

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Walking through the Grand Emporium of Dew Keep, you are met by your childhood rival, Brian the Bulbous, who now holds the title and armour of The Knight of Tendie Tower.

5yr ⋅

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[REQUEST] A Redpilled Prophet loudly offers his assistance against the femoids

6yr ⋅

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Servant of the Many Fedora'd God

7yr ⋅

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You walk into y’lady’s castle and find a warrior clad in White Armor awaiting you. He yells out “Heathen! You’re far too crude for this fair maiden, I will defend her honor at all costs.” and readies his blade.

3yr ⋅

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Do you love or hate TikTok?

1yr ⋅

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While traveling through the Brony Steppes, you encounter a small Brony warband frolicking by a stream. Startled by your presence, the junior bronies cower behind their war chief. Perhaps the bronies will shelter you for the night and supply you with fresh tendies, if you can earn their trust.

4yr ⋅

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Colonel Plini Slaznov has an assignment for you: post misinformation online about the war effort. Just... make shit up. Anything. Tell them our enemy has vampires or some shit like that and we’ll pay you in piroshky(russian potato tendies) and mail-order brides. Make the chads doubt their resolve.

1yr ⋅

⋅

The psychic Archaeus asks you a question Do you wish to know what the future holds for you?

3yr ⋅

⋅

At long last you receive the ultimate reward of the campaign

3yr ⋅

⋅

Two young, unclaimed waifus have gotten stuck while shelving wares at the local shoopkeep. One cries out for help, while the other looks at you lustfully, how do you proceed?

2yr ⋅

⋅

You are drawn to the sweet smell of tendies which leads to a Walmart parking lot. You find the source of the tendies, an unnatended wagon. But, plan your moves carefully, for the treasure is guarded by a swarm of beasts.

3yr ⋅

⋅

Bow down to yoar ultimate Leader. Most magnificent Neckbeard of all time. Nero of Rome.

5yr ⋅

⋅

Traveling through the frozen wastelands of Bestbuyvia, looking for the precious artifact known as the PS5, you encounter N. B. Santa. He has a quest for you. Either you accept it or prepare to face his wrath. What do you do?

3yr ⋅

⋅

You encounter a mystical item, one that holds great power. The McDonalds cashier must've slipped you this as a sign of respect. What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

⋅

An ancient force approaches: Gram Gram, the Believer of a Paltry God

7yr ⋅

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As the Noontide draws near, you gird yourself for a confrontation with the Dread Patriarch...

6yr ⋅

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As you wait for the next train, you notice the Subway Vigilante ahead of you. He could be a valuable ally, but he is known to command a high price for his skills with the blade. His back may be turned to you, but that does not mean he isn't aware of your presence. What do you do?

4yr ⋅

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Boss Fight: 'Revolver Eatsalot'

5yr ⋅

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You come face to face with one of the most looked up to in all of Neckbeardia. What dew you dew?

3yr ⋅

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