2282 best r/divorcedbirds images on Pholder | “Bring it!!” he shouted. No one was going to tell Fabio not to wear pink, to fix his ruffled feathers because the pattern annoyed them, or to not show off his pantelones. Not even the squawking hens. He’d be single but he’d be happy knowing he was being true to himself.

“Bring it!!” he shouted. No one was going to tell Fabio not to wear pink, to fix his ruffled feathers because the pattern annoyed them, or to not show off his pantelones. Not even the squawking hens. He’d be single but he’d be happy knowing he was being true to himself.

1yr ⋅ ⋅

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My name isn't Polly. It's Veronica. VER-RON-NI-CAA. Polly was your first wife, Dilbert.

2yr ⋅

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Franklin got home with the fish and realized he was still shopping for two.

5yr ⋅

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David said “let my weight be damned, I’m gorgeous.” When Charles left months ago, it’s true David stress-ate, and ate and ate... right into a size Fabulous!

3yr ⋅

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Jim's hairline was receding, and there was no way around it. His ex wife, Judy, had nagged him for years about it, hinting at how undesirable it made him. Well, Jim decided he couldn't control his balding, but, he could control how he felt, and that started with his clothes.

3yr ⋅

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“It’s a bit much for a high school reunion,” Sarah gently advised Margaret. But Margaret had been saving this gown since prom, and since she was newly single, it wouldn’t hurt to remind her old flame of their times together

3yr ⋅

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And are the blow torches in there too? Marla asked, looking in the bag at the drive-thru Home Depot. Everyone had always accused her of being an 'odd duck' growing up...Well, now that she'd seen the texts between Richard and McKaaylaa...this odd duck was planning on getting even.

2yr ⋅

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Henry had 9 years of sobriety under his belt, but after discovering Linda’s affair, it all went out the window

2yr ⋅

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Ever since her divorce, Margaret has been spilling all the tea.

4yr ⋅

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GET OUT LIONEL. Your rampant infidelity has turned our home from a cact-US to a cact-I. If I'm going to get hurt again by a *small prick* it'll be from these here cactus needles. Oh, *sorry*, I meant cact-I needles, Georgette cried, hopefully for the last time.

4yr ⋅

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Bob was just so happy to find someone appeared to love dressing up for the Carnival as much as he did!

3yr ⋅

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Kylie had been very sad since her dad flew the coop and she and her mom had had to move. Her mom hoped she’d make new friends in her junior ballet class.

4yr ⋅

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Picking up the boys from their weekend at Dave’s, Linda was glad that they kept things amicable for the children. As much as they now hated each other, they both still loved little Tyler and Tyson. And that was worth having to pretend and make make small talk twice a month.

3yr ⋅

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Bernice, Mary, and Eleanor refuse to let their good-for-nothing ex-husbands hold them back. Taking particular care to coordinate their hats with their dresses, these three ladies are reentering society in style.

4yr ⋅

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Janice knew the rules were clear about wearing white at a second wedding. But what about your fourth?

4yr ⋅

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Sherrie knew it pissed Greg off that she decided to spend the entire alimony settlement on plastic surgery. She didn’t care what he thought any more, she knew she looked GREAT.

4yr ⋅

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After her husband left her just before their eggs were laid, Irma had to turn to the Church for housing assistance.

2yr ⋅

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Pete suspected that his wife was cheating on him, so he hired some drones to spy on her. He took them out to the bar after the job was done to see if his suspicions were true. Marv, the boss, cracked open a mead and then handed it to Pete. Yah guna need this maw than me, he said with a sad smile.

3yr ⋅

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Oh no no I’m not in the Blue Bird group yet. I’m afraid I just Blue myself.

3yr ⋅

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Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your ears. Yes the rumors are true, I will be divorcing Octavia on the charge of adultery. True I have many (many 😉) mistresses, but Octavia the SKANK chose to say 'thank you' to a merchant so...anyway Cleopatra where you at?

4yr ⋅

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After being unhappy in a loveless marriage for years, Janet finally decided to take herself on a date, and went for that walk on the beach she was yearning for so long. The sea is beautiful, and life is too she thought as she gazed at the waves.

2yr ⋅

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Brenda took half the house so Anthony took half of Brendas fur coats out of spite. although it started as a bit of a joke he actually wore this one all the time now.

2yr ⋅

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Lorraine's new boyfriend Tommy was quite a catch. He was much less of a nag than her ex-husband Arthur, who had only finally shut that beak of his when he died. She hadn't heard so much as a squeak out of Tommy over the past few days. What bliss!

2yr ⋅

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“Marge? Please, let’s just talk about this,” Duncan looked at her with puppy-dog eyes — the same look he had given her twenty years ago when he asked her to be his wife. She was so happy then...but now? Looking at his big round eyes, she felt nothing. “I’m not happy, Duncan. I want a divorce.”

4yr ⋅

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Elizabeth had just received a lovely fur coat from Harold for Valentine's Day. Maybe she was being too hasty, but she knows he's Mr. Right number 4.

2yr ⋅

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Dolores has been trough it all: 3 failed marriages, two miscarries and an eviction, she stands proud today with her chin up and looking at her future

4yr ⋅

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Bob had always hated “unnatural” hair colors but now that he was gone Amy could embrace all of her rainbow dreams!

2yr ⋅

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At the Pride parade, Jonah could be the bird he always wanted to be. It didn't matter what his ex-wife or parents thought. After 46 long years, he could finally spread his wings and be free.

3yr ⋅

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Jeffrey was tired after an 18 hour shift in his long haul truck. All he wanted was to be home, hug his wife, feed his kids regurgitated food, and watch TV. But he knew that life was gone. After the divorce, there was no going back. It was just him, his truck, his freshly shorn ballchin, and the road

1yr ⋅

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Meet Maksim and Irina. Two Russian siblings travelling the world in hopes to find love. It’s only day 3 of this fantasy trip and they are already missing the comforts of harsh vodka and borscht..

3yr ⋅

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Harry wore his best grey suit to court. He wanted Margaret to regret that she was losing him - her buff, handsome husband. As he looked in the mirror, however, he felt a brief twinge of regret for all those times he had skipped leg day.

4yr ⋅

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After a series of terrible marriages (which were all 100% not his fault), Elliott swore off females altogether. He declared himself a member of BGTOW (birds going their own way) and spent all his time on Reddit trashing women, who were all slutty and/or frigid.

4yr ⋅

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It would be so easy, Miranda thought looking over her passed out husband. Just do nothing and the house, the car, the bank accounts...it could all be mine. No need for lawyers this time.

4yr ⋅

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thinking about a divorce

2yr ⋅

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Jennifer was slowly learning to trust again after Harold’s betrayal. She had been unsure about whether or not to accept Hannah’s invitation to the museum, but she has been so understanding... She takes a chance, and reaches out to take Hannah’s hand.

4yr ⋅

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Richard. Age 58. Recently single and ready to mingle. Interested in women, age 18-26.

3yr ⋅

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Juliea with an e, you are just the STEP 'mom'. I am the BIOLOGICAL MOTHER. What do you do with steps? You STEP on them. With your FEET. BIO from BIOLOGICAL means LIFE. So if I EVER hear that you're treating MY son as anything other than the GOD that he is, I will put the cuss in custody, got it?

4yr ⋅

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Bob, I'm pregnant. And if you don't tell your wife about us, I will! My wife can't find out about us! She'd kill me! And how can you be pregnant?! We only did anal! We're birds, you idiot! It's the same hole!

2yr ⋅

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Gwendoline always wanted to be a burlesque dancer but her husband always held her back. Now she’s ready to strut her stuff. You’re never too old

4yr ⋅

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Gertrude had been quite a looker in her youth, but the many health issues caused by her dreadful diet and lifestyle were now catching up with her.

1yr ⋅

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It was his first time at a singles bar since the divorce, and Gary was nervous. He went to the washroom to check himself out in the mirror one more time. His combover was still in place, he looked good, and he was ready to mingle!

3yr ⋅

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Elaine was quietly confident that she could get rolling with her new life now. After all, she'd done a such superb job of hiding Tony's remains.. hadn't she just ? oh, yes!

4yr ⋅

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Stanley prostrated himself in front of Rebecca. He was sorry for cheating and promised he’d never do it again.

2yr ⋅

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Martha snuck one last longing look at her multi-million dollar mansion where she once lived with her beloved. She told Dave she would leave eventually, and he never believed her. Now, at 3am, with nothing but her dignity, she rides off into the distance to start her new life.

3yr ⋅

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With Ralph finally out of the picture Gladys and Daphne were free to practice their burlesque act in peace

1yr ⋅

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Beulah dumped that jerk Roger who insisted she get plastic surgery. She knew, deep down, she was fabulous and worthy of love.

4yr ⋅

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Randal hadn’t dated in 40 years, and understanding dating language was challenging. For him, a hookup still happened between a trailer and a ball hitch, Tinder was something used to start a fire, and (Blue Footed) Booby pics could be found in a birding field guide.

4yr ⋅

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After divorce Sharron decided to live for herself and finally eat whatever she wanted.

4yr ⋅

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Vivian always told Allen that bolder colors didn’t work with his frame. Well Allen couldn’t disagree more! He felt very handsome in his new outfit. The magenta top really pulled it together!

4yr ⋅

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Why are you kissing my forehead, Stan? It's the Kiss of Divorce. Like the Kiss of Death the mafia does, but for divorce. That's not how that works, Stan. You need to hire a lawyer. That sounds expensive. It is Stan. That's why I haven't done it yet.

1yr ⋅

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He was 20 years younger, but Berniece didn't care. The cheating, the lying, she'd put up with it for 15 years, tonight in this dive bar it was her turn to shine.

2yr ⋅

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Veronica and Bill weren’t talking any more. It felt like it was always children, children, children. There was now little time for the romance that had first led them to fall passionately, head-over-heels in love...

1yr ⋅

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Pamela had been saving up to surprise her husband with a new Lamborghini when she walked in on him nesting with a younger bird. That was the last nail in the coffin of their loveless marriage and she was finally free to take her BFFLs on the holiday of a lifetime. Friends are the family you choose.

4yr ⋅

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Mark knew that his relationship with Peggy might ruffle some feathers but nothing was going to waver his affection towards his new lady after the breakup.

3yr ⋅

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Screw social distancing! Eileen had been planning this girls trip for months, and nothing could keep her away from the sun, sand, and the (hunky) men of the Barbados. She’s here for a good time, not a long time 🍸

4yr ⋅

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Dating sure has changed after a decade being married. Peaches' new guy has a major food fetish. She's getting used to it, even though being wrapped in hot burrito sauce sometimes feels a little TOO spicy.

3yr ⋅

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I will walk where I want. I will fly where I want. I march anywhere I damn well please, and right now, that is OUT THE DOOR Mitch!! Tulisa wasn't one for scenes, but she knew how to make a grand exit.

2yr ⋅

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Tyler's first date in 20 years-Hey hope you don't mind that I stalked your social media hehe! So your Bora Bora pictures from 2017 were AMAZE, but in that lower right pic in the album preview, the one where you're wearing an azure bikini top, you look a *little* sad. What happened there, my dear?

3yr ⋅

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They say indifference is the true death knell of a relationship, and Gary had tuned out Elaine’s ranting so completely that they both had to realize that the end was indeed imminent.

3yr ⋅

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Earl had become unbearable during quarantine and Alice threw him out. She hoped she could find a new man at the FaceApp church social.

4yr ⋅

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Derek was NOT taking this divorce well. The seventh time he passed out drunk on the lawn under his nest, he woke up to his ex-wife, his sister and her husband trying to have an intervention right then and there.

3yr ⋅

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“Do you think you made the right decision divorcing her?”, Larry asked. “I’m not sure. Just feel like suddenly there is a big hole in my heart.” Ben replied, while his eyes were gazing at the never ending waves

2yr ⋅

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When the teen heartthrob singer flew into town, all the newly single ladies came out to try their luck

1yr ⋅

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When Kylie told him it was either the marriage or the band, Quint chose the band. Five years later he had yet to reach stardom but he was happy with no regrets.

4yr ⋅

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Their unconventional relationship was riveting in her youth but their obvious differences had become more apparent as of late. Naomi could hardly hide her look of disdain as Laurence suggested restaurants for dinner.

4yr ⋅

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“All dressed up with nowhere to go,” said Horace. Lockdown was making it difficult to meet ladies on Plenty of Hens and Zoom dates were all they could do for the next few weeks. He hoped his date this evening appreciated the new bow-tie he ordered specially for this occasion.

3yr ⋅

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Hide your daughters, I AM FINALLY SINGLE AGAIN!

3yr ⋅

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Drew knew that he'd messed up. He'd smoked too much pot last year when his life fell apart. But he was better now. He was doing yoga. Drinking tea. Volunteering. And while, yes, he was nervous as he approached the courthouse, he knew that the only joint that he wanted now...was joint custody.

3yr ⋅

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When the police arrived, June still hadn’t finished cleaning the blood off herself. “I swear, officer, he ran into my knife! He ran into my knife ten times!”

4yr ⋅

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Never speak to me or my boy again! You can toss feathers from another nest for all I care! Cheri says as she moves on from another cheating bird.

3yr ⋅

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After two failed marriages to the chronically unemployed Dale and Kevin, Misty decided this time she wanted a provider. And Mark was a great provider, despite not being her usual type.

2yr ⋅

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Look at the tufts on that titmouse, gasped Larry as he got his first glimpse of his next ex-wife.

2yr ⋅

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Did Casey let herself go? Juries are out (for lunch).

1yr ⋅

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Phillip thought he was safe and would not use protection on his trip to Thailand. He was served once back at home.

3yr ⋅

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Simon was mocked so badly by his Ex for his balding, that he's too traumatized to try to date again.

3yr ⋅

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Rick's alcoholism had driven Jessica and the chicks from the nest. 40 ounces to freedom! he crowed. It was a cry for help as much as it was a promise.

4yr ⋅

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She was tired of pretending, this was who she was and he could take it or leave it.

11mo ⋅

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Picking fights with random strangers was the only thrill of George’s life after Sandra left him

4yr ⋅

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He took her out for fresh lizard AND he's holding her hand? Maria couldn't believe that Bob had rebounded so quickly.

4yr ⋅

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*insert dramatic bird story here*

1yr ⋅

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Glenn gave himself a hard look in the club’s bathroom mirror. “This habit has got to stop,” he told himself.

1yr ⋅

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Bruce was embarrassed to be single this Valentine’s Day after his messy divorce. Next year though.. no ladyjay would be able to resist his blue steel gaze after all this practice!

2yr ⋅

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Patricia knew she had truly arrived in her senior years, since she could no longer go out in public without wearing Depends. But that wasn't going to stop her from seeing if she could find any eligible interested and interested men.

1yr ⋅

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James took Jenny for granted for too long. All he could do was cry his eyes out over the loss of his love and hairline.

1yr ⋅

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Jo emerges from quarantine newly single, with grown-out hair. She doesn’t know what starting over means or how she’ll get by, but after such a low, there’s no where to go but up.

3yr ⋅

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She gave up everything for her job in order to give her family everything they could want. And because of that the judge gave her kids to her slacker ex husband ? Life didn't make sense to her anymore. Every day on the way to work she thinks a little bit longer about just driving into a wall...

1yr ⋅

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Donald knew it was pretty reckless to get a tattoo of Mickey... needless to say he regretted it after the divorce...

3yr ⋅

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Florence knows some people assumed her interspecies relationship with Rex is all about shock value - and maybe it is- but the truth is he loves her unabashedly and is loyal to the death, so who’s to judge? Plus, they both enjoy a dinner of freshly killed rabbit and crisp fall romps in the woods.

4yr ⋅

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After feeling like he never fitted in, Greg found his fabulous side.

3yr ⋅

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Hank had only been able to afford 78% of his hair transplant, as money was tight post divorce. I don't *really* think anyone can tell that it's a hair transplant, right? he asked. The cashier at Aldi offered a weak smile. Credit or debit? she chirped. Debit. Definitely debit, Hank replied.

4yr ⋅

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HeIGHt/WeIGht pROpoRTIonATE FeMALes ONLy b/c I LEad A VEry ACtiVE LIFeSTyle on 4chan and 9gag IF you'Re BMI iS ABoVe 25 thEN gIRL BYE IF you'RE BMI Is beLOW 18 giRL You'RE A quEEn 👸 HMU on InstA scholarlygentlemann b/c I CAn't rEsPOnd to LIkes on HeRE ty.

4yr ⋅

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Rhonda may have had a little work done after the divorce was finalized. Some might say it was a bit much, but I say you can’t put a price on good self esteem

2yr ⋅

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This is Gigi, she is a bit chaotic and on the market again. My creative juices suck today, please give me your best stories in the comments.

4yr ⋅

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Peter gawked helplessly as Julia sashayed her way past him. He wiped the drool off his beak and stammered as he tried to speak. He was a fool for letting her go, but it was too late. His ex wife was living her best life, and, with a sad sigh, he realized he was not a part of it.

4yr ⋅

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‚Too much?‘ Cassandra wondered, as she wore her new hat to the farmers market. Bertram had always wanted her to dress moderately and would’ve been deeply embarrassed by her attire. But not anymore! It was her time to shine and she would finally be the colorful bird she had always been on the inside!

3yr ⋅

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Who needs a wife when you are THE DUNGEON MASTER

4yr ⋅

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The divorce papers were signed and Zack was ready for some female companionship. He waited patiently for The Sex. After all, he had held the *door* open for eight different women. Yes he held the door open as only a true gentleman does. He held the DOOR OPEN. THE DOOR. The...*automatic*...door.

4yr ⋅

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Vern had it good. Two weeks in Aruba, skiing in Vail, a trip around the Cape, all thanks to his new “business associates.” But one icy morning, there was knock on his door. Vern looked through the keyhole and his heart sank. Standing at his doorstep was the IRS.

3yr ⋅

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Mabel had gone all out changing up her appearance after Henry left her for a younger woman. With new hair, new makeup and a new attitude, Mabel was ready to enter the dating world. Eat your heart out, Henry.

3yr ⋅

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“No, officer, I haven’t seen my husband in weeks. Yes, I’m terribly worried.”

4yr ⋅

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Janet wasn’t sure about the hat. It was her first date since the divorce, and she wanted to appear stylish, but feared that she just looked silly.

4yr ⋅

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Gretta knew when she married Phillip that she was no match for the younger chicks he had eyes for. No matter, at least with his alimony check she could buy what old age took from her. She hopes it's not to obviouse (it is)

4yr ⋅

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Frank decided if he couldn’t have Sally no one would

2yr ⋅

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Terry-Beth took a deep breath before updating her profile. She wanted suitors to see what happened to the last snake in her life, while highlighting her post-divorce glow-up.

2yr ⋅

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Gregoria’s obsession with fur coats started when she could no longer feel the warmth of her husband’s love.

4yr ⋅

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Paul looked mournfully down at what was left of his clothes. Linda had just thrown them all on the front lawn, not even caring if the neighbors saw. He knew he needed to face up to what he knew deep down: the marriage was over, and had been over for a very long time.

3yr ⋅

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Divorced, but too poor to actually separate, Dan and Becky decided to rent out a bedroom to pay off the mortgage faster. Living with the two of them was a bit awkward for their tenant.

1yr ⋅

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And Daddy will still love me? Yes dear, with all his heart.

2yr ⋅

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Yes, my son is in all my pictures. Horace left US! The first thing I said to Harrison when his dad left was “owl always be there for you.” I have to make the dad jokes now. If you don’t want to be a part of Harrison’s life you don’t deserve me. (Must be at least six inches tall and have a nest.)

4yr ⋅

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“I’ve got to get a hold of myself” thought Herb.

2yr ⋅

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Trent decided to go with the “flexing” pics for his Tinder profile, hoping they wouldn’t look too extra.

4yr ⋅

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A year post-divorce, Gerald decided to dip his claws in the dating pool again. He thought maybe if he learned a new skill it might help his prospects, so he signed up for a German folk dance class.

3yr ⋅

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To hell with conventions, said Brandon to himself, when he saw that kitty girl glancing at him at the bar. Sticking with tradicional got him nothing but pain and half of his assets leaving with Sheila. An amazing casual date later, the risk paid off: Gigi was the best cuddler he had ever met.

4yr ⋅

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